Reactive patterns are mechanical processes that operate when situations trigger associations with past events. They cause you to react to the present situation on the basis of past conditioning, not on the basis of what is happening now

Are you nothing but a collection of reactive patterns? If so, how can you change? If not, what are you?

Identify a reactive pattern you wish to dismantle -- reacting to disagreement with anger, for instance. How did you recognize it?

As long as you see the pattern as part of who you are, you will not be able to dismantle it. To separate from the pattern, consider:

• Is your behavior in line with your intention in the situation?
• Does it serve your well-being?
• Does it use behaviors and motivations that reflect how you want to be?

Think of a specific action that you can do that interrupts the pattern when it arises. When you do it, what happens in you? What happens in the situation?

What happens in you when the result of a conversation is different from your intention?

• Become rigid
• Connect with the other person in order to influence his or her views
• Become angry or seethe inside
• Talk about other subjects to avoid discomfort
• Fall into confusion or despair

What other ways could you act?

What prevents you from seeing other options in the moment?

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